Chutnefying conversation of Indian Politicians

Narendra Modi: I have Charisma… To become next Prime Minister.

Rahul Gandhi: I have Cars and I have Maa. Both Italian.

SP and TMC: We are the wives of government, no matter which party comes into power.

Nitish Kumar: If you give special quota to Bihar, I’ll be the Prime Minister of Bihar.

Mayawati: Somebody talked about quota? That’s my copyright. By the way, BSP is the third wife of government.

Kapil Sibbal: You only talk about quota. I am the one who executes it.

Mani Shankar Aiyar: Kapil, come to Chintan Shivir. Let’s chant for Indian Obama(Rahul).

P. Chidambaram: Who will be future Obama, only time will tell. Guess people don’t read Economist.

L.K. Advani: Neither Rahul, nor Modi. Sirf chalegi Advani ki vaani… Waah

Mohan Bhagwat: Dude, that will be decided in Nagpur. May be you and Modi both can be PMs – one for India, one for Bharat.

Arvind Kejriwal: Two PM conspiracy? I will disclose that tomorrow. But there will be two Parliaments – one in Ramlila Maidan other in Jantar Mantar.

Anna Hazare: Kejriwal is India’s Julian Assange. But he is as dumb as a politician as others are.

Baba Ramdev: If not Prime Minister, make me Finance Minister – I will print more money and make India a rich country.

Abhijit Mukherji: You cannot be a minister Baba. You wear women’s clothes. You are dainted and painted.I wish i could get the presidency in heritage just like Rahul Ji.

Sonia Gandhi: Manmohan! Bring Mukherji to 10 janpath. Bring a stick also.

Manmohan Singh: Theek Hai.

Raj Thackeray: Keep chanting Theek Hai. Enemies will cross the borders soon. If i come to power, i will thrash whole Pakistan.

Owaisi: Stop the police for fifteen minutes, and you will understand who thrashes whom.

Kiran Bedi: O dear, Let me educate you about law. Your resume perfectly suits the job description of a prisoner in Tihar.

Arun Jaitley: If you seek legal advice, contact me. Despite my repeated clashes with govt in Parliament, i won’t get PM chair. Better make money somewhere else.

Sushma Swaraj: What an idea Jaitley ji. We two are on same boat i guess. Except my Hindi is slightly better. Lol.

Khaap Panchayat: Trying to be smart. You people might be pundits of Law. But we are the ones who rule the real India rather – Bharat.

Aamir Khan: Thanks guys. You’re kindly invited to the first episode of SMJ season 2.

Chetan Bhagat: Aamir, let’s make a movie also. But please give some credit to me also. My name is Chetan and i am not a writer.

Sushil Kumar Shinde: Chetan you’re a thief. You stole my statement – I am Hindu and I am not a terrorist.

Shahrukh Khan: Haha. That was copied from Badshah’s dialogue from My name is Khan.

Shashi Tharoor: As if you make original movies. Jab tak hai jaan – was from Greene’s novel. But i don’t care about politics or movies. I am busy in loving my 50 crores worthy wife.

Laloo Prasad: No one can make better love than me. I have nine kids.

Digvijay Singh: But you still don’t have power.

Nitin Gadkari: Even Congress won’t get in to power Sir. Next PM will be from BJP…

Digvijay Singh: No, it’ll be Congress…

Arnab Goswami: Keep talking. I am all set to interview next PM.

A dead silence. Manmohan Singh smiles and thinks – “Theek hai”